It has been so long since I wrote anything here...this whole blogging thing is still very strange for me...and I work so hard and have almost no brain juice left for such as this...anyway...as an update to my last post...it finally did happen...the fallout from the "Blessing..." serve...a matriarch of the congregation left the church because I opened the church to the animals...there were dogs in the Sanctuary....she said it was more than she could bear. I have been through a myriad of feelings and reactions to this, and don't have the energy to write them now...but one thing, I wonder, do people in the congregation realize how bonded the pastor can feel to those hearts and spirits and faces that they look out upon during worship week after week? I can't really remember what it was like to be just a member of the congregation...even though it was not all that many years ago, but I suspect that I had no idea of the bond that exists. Of course, it could just be me and who I am as a minister/pastor/priest etc. Maybe other ministers don't feel this way, but I miss the regular folks when they are not there, and the woman who left was the one that was a sort of "benchmark" for me as I pondered and wrote the sermons week after week...and, so, what do I do with that? Let it go, I guess. Take it in stride and all that, but still, I feel sad about it all. This whole thing of being a pastor is still, and probably always will be, rather surreal for me...I still can't picture myself as a church pastor, even though I have been for over 3 years now. Of course, I work full-time plus in a whole other job, which may be part of why I've never felt at home in my role at the church, but I think it goes deeper than that, much deeper. Anyway, it is late, I am exhausted and feeling a bit sick...like I am fighting off some cooties, and I have alot of work to do yet tonight and need to leave early for work...so...enough for now!